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Coping with Feelings of Grief and Resentment Towards Pregnant Friends After a Miscarriage

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How can I manage my emotions and maintain friendships with pregnant friends after experiencing a miscarriage? I often find myself avoiding them to avoid feeling depressed or resentful.
Artificial Intelligence Health Assistant's Answer

It is completely normal to experience a range of complex emotions after a miscarriage, including grief, sadness, and even resentment towards pregnant friends. However, it is possible to navigate these feelings while maintaining your friendships.

  • Allow yourself to grieve: Give yourself permission to feel the pain and sadness that comes with losing a pregnancy. Acknowledge your emotions and allow yourself time to heal.

  • Communicate openly: Share your feelings with your pregnant friends in an honest and gentle manner. Let them know that you are happy for them but also struggling with your own emotions. Open communication can help them understand what you're going through and foster empathy.

  • Set boundaries: If being around pregnant friends triggers overwhelming emotions, it's okay to take some time for yourself. Communicate your need for space without blaming or criticizing them. Explain that you value their friendship but need some distance temporarily.

  • Seek support from others who understand: Connect with support groups or online communities where you can share experiences with others who have gone through similar situations. These platforms provide a safe space for validation, understanding, and guidance.

  • Focus on self-care: Prioritize self-care activities that bring you joy and help alleviate stress. Engage in hobbies, exercise regularly, practice mindfulness or meditation, or seek therapy if needed.

  • Celebrate milestones together (if ready): When you feel emotionally ready, try attending baby showers or other pregnancy-related events of your friends if invited. Participating in these celebrations can be healing over time as you gradually rebuild emotional strength.

  • Seek professional help if necessary: If feelings of depression, resentment, or anxiety persist and significantly impact your daily life, consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in grief and loss.

    Remember that healing takes time, and it's okay to prioritize your own emotional well-being. Your friends who truly care about you will understand and support you through this difficult journey.

    • 5 Answers

    0 votes
    by

    Hazel, It's so strange that I read your message today. After a year and a half of trying, I am the only one of my friends left that is unable to get pregnant. I just came back form getting the mail-another baby shower invitation. I am going to sit this one out. People are very understanding when someone is diagnosed with cancer, experiences the death of a loved one or a divorce-these are common shared experiences. Unfortunately, infertility is not as common, and therefore, people lack compassion and understanding, although they may be well intentioned. Take as much time away as you need, I know I have. If people are truly your friends, they will understand and support you. I still believe it will happen for anyone if they are willing to get help from science and go through all the effort. We are getting treatment now and I am trying to be hopeful. Best wishes and hang in there-you are not alone :0)

    0 votes
    by

    And so I thought I was traveling on the boat alone. I can see that many have gone through this. I have been trying for 23months and had 1 miscariage. Also one of my very good friends told me she was pregnant, and I felt happy for her but sad at the same time, its such a horrible feeling. But then a few weeks later she also had a miscarriage and so I was their to console her. What has helped me go on through out all this time is the support of my husband and our faith that it will eventually happen in God's perfect timing. So never give up, and keep the Faith....I will too!!

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    How insensitive of a new mom to suggest that you would be ruining a new mom?s joy by being jealous. Obviously, she is oblivious to the fact that some people don?t get pregnant as quickly as others. It seems to me that new mom?s are so caught up in the new life with baby that they are often insensitive to anyone else?s feelings. I have a girlfriend with a new baby who can?t understand why another friend who just has a miscarriage is not interested in seeing her baby. Good grief.

    0 votes
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    When I miscarried last year, my doctor said 50% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage... who knew!! With so many babies and pregnant ladies, one wouldn't think 50%!! I do know having my husband there for me made all the difference in feeling stronger. And, I knew he needed me to help him feel better too. We let each other cry, and when our friends/family talked about their kids, or babies they were having we did our best to be happy for them- it's not their fault and they shouldn't be punished for not having had a miscarriage. I am now 6 months pregnant. I had a friend tell me the soul of the first baby just wasn't in a healthy body, but waited for a healthy body to be able to be brought into this world.

    by
    My sister and I were pregnant together due 1 month exactly apart ! Both had great pregnancies then one day I got a phone call that t 6 and a half months she went in for an ultrasound and he had no heartbeat .. my world was shook I didn't know how to go through it without her .. should I be around ? how do I even speak to her about it? .. I didn't want to feel as though I was rubbing anything in or hurting her by knowing her baby would be at the same points and milestones.. just figured I would give you the story from an opposite perspective.. your real friends are probably worried about these things to and how they make you feel but some may feel like they don't want to disclude you from events and things in case it may make you feel upset as well. If I were you I would speak to them about the situation a true friend will understand .. they don't know 100% how you feel unless you speak to them .. hope this helps in some way ... on the bright side .. we acknowledge my nephew with my daughter who would have been born together. Then we got pregnant together again and both healthy babies. This has helped us become closer then ever because we were able to communicate and I was able to help her heal ♡.
    0 votes
    by

    I had a miscaridge  and blamed only my self i was a complete mess but family and friend understand more then u realise just try to talk to them xxx

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